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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26329267">A Pansy for My Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Its_real_for_us/pseuds/Its_real_for_us'>Its_real_for_us</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Closeted Character, Eavesdropping, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Friends With Benefits, Gryffindor/Slytherin Inter-House Relationships, Hurt, Infidelity, Love, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Sapphic September</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:00:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,152</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26329267</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Its_real_for_us/pseuds/Its_real_for_us</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I can't believe you're still shagging her." Hermione froze, two steps away from the sitting room's entrance. It sounded like Blaise Zabini. "I thought you were a one-night stand kind of gal, Pansy. Are you getting attached to her? Who would've thought," he said mockingly. </p><p>"You know I'm not, darling. She's just a good fuck, that's all."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hermione Granger/Pansy Parkinson, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>149</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A Pansy for My Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Okay, so, I've never done this but the first part of the story between these "//" and these "//" isn't mine. There was no ending and my friend, the one this story is dedicated to, inspired me to finish it since she loved the original so, so much. After reading, I agreed and really wanted to add to it.</p><p>The first part is written by Gigi - @snortinglaughter on Tumblr and A03 &amp; the second part, after the second "//", is written by me.</p><p>You should check her out, she has some great, great works! I really love her writing style. The original version was named Mudblood. ♡</p><p>Also, please take the time to kudos and comment! It means a lot to me!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>//</strong>
</p><p>"I can't believe you're still shagging her." Hermione froze, two steps away from the sitting room's entrance. It sounded like Blaise Zabini. "I thought you were a one-night stand kind of gal, Pansy. Are you getting attached to her? Who would've thought," he said mockingly. </p><p>"You know I'm not, darling. She's just a good fuck, that's all."</p><p>"There's nothing wrong with falling in love with a woman, Pans." </p><p>"I know there's not, but I don't love her Blaise. Besides can you imagine what my parents would say if they saw me walking around hand in hand with a Mudblood? And not just any Mudblood, the girl who helped Harry Potter defeat the Dark Lord. They would cut me off for good. I have no intention to be looking for a job in Diagon Alley," Pansy said, emotionless. </p><p>Hermione's heart shattered into pieces, she felt hot tears running down her cheeks. She covered her mouth to avoid any sound coming out. Hermione hadn't cared what other people would think or say, she loved Pansy more than anything, she was willing to give up everything for her, to come out to her friends and family, break up with Ron, introduce her to Hermione's parents, maybe she and Harry could be at least friendly acquaintances if they gave it a try. She thought Pansy loved her back the same way Hermione did. She was wrong.</p><p>"Why did you let her stay overnight, then?"</p><p>"Draco cancelled breakfast at the Manor, and she had a fight with Weasley. Thought I could get a nice morning shag. She might seem uptight, but she's always quite thirsty for it," Pansy laughed.</p><p>That was enough. Hermione walked quietly back to Pansy's bedroom, grabbed her shoes and coat and immediately Apparated back to her own sitting room.</p><p>She blocked the Floo and collapsed on the floor, crying her heart out. How could she be so naïve, so stupid? How could she think Pansy would ever love her back? </p><p>She'd been willing to do anything for her, she hadn't cared about their past, and Pansy only thought of her as her dirty little secret, Hermione was nothing more than <em>"just a good fuck"</em>. The words resonated in her head and Hermione screamed with anger and sadness. How could she not see this coming?</p><p>She didn't know how much time had passed since she got home and laid there feeling hopeless. Tears were still falling from her eyes when Hermione felt herself fade away to sleep. <em>Good</em>. She wanted to stay numb for the rest of her life.</p><p>After what seemed like five seconds later, she woke up to a soft noise somewhere on her right and turned to see a white barn owl tapping her window. Hermione winced at the feeling of a massive headache building up. It was probably midday already. She slowly walked towards the window and took the note the owl was carrying. It was Pansy's handwriting.</p><p>"Where did you go, love? I'm not finished with you yet. Come at 9 pm?"</p><p>Hermione's body trembled with anger and she ripped the note to tiny pieces. The owl stood there expectant as if waiting for Hermione's response.</p><p>"I've got nothing for you, go away!" she snapped angrily and shut the window down. She stomped to her bedroom and abruptly stopped in her tracks when she saw Ron's owl standing on her desk with a note tied to its leg. She'd forgotten she'd left her bedroom window open.</p><p>"Hey Mione, I'm sorry I made you upset last night. I understand if you're not ready."</p><p>Hermione turned the note to write a response on the back. A wave of memories crossed her mind before the quill touched the parchment. She thought of Pansy's full lips and soft hands, her figure in a tight short dress. The way she looked at Hermione while they laid in bed.</p><p><em>"Can you imagine what my parents would say if they saw me walking around hand in hand with a Mudblood?"</em> Hermione remembered.</p><p>She scribbled her response.</p><p>"I accept Ron. I'll marry you."</p><p>
  <strong>//</strong>
</p><p>Pansy's fiery, almond-shaped, hazel eyes burned in Hermione's mind as Ron's owl flew away, note in its claws. This is for the best. <em>What had I expected? When do Slytherins and Gryffindors ever work out, anyway? </em></p><p>Hermiome thought back on Harry and Draco, he'd married Astoria after telling Harry about the same. She exhaled, letting the memories engulf her like chilled winter wind.</p><p><em>"He said we had to stop this, that he's marrying her, and that whatever this may be is over..."</em> </p><p>
  <em>"I'm so sorry, Harry!" </em>
</p><p><em>"It's for the best."</em> Hermione thought back on his words. <em>This has to be for the better as well. It would only cause further heartbreak had it continued</em>. She ran her fingers through her tawny curls, her heart was drumming in her ears, causing her to feel unsteady. </p><p>Pansy's smell stuck to her clothes, jasmine hand cream to be exact, and her taste, something along the lines of cinnamon heart candies, still lingered on her breath. </p><p>This was so damn difficult. And I had thought the pretending was hard? She sighed, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. Hermione didn't want to marry Ron, not after having experienced such sentiments for the black-lipstick-wearing witch. <em>How could that all have been pretend? </em></p><p>Despite their short encounter, it had been the most real thing Hermione had ever felt. It was so wrong, that it was right. The tears she'd managed to stop earlier returned to her eyes full force, blurring her version like the undeveloped film her mum always carried around with her after long strolls in the park.</p><p>Suddenly, the room shifted and swayed before the silhouette of her best mate appeared in front of her. <em>Damn, he can still Apparate in!</em> Harry was never blocked from coming in and out as he pleased. They'd promised each other full transparency, keeping their flats open at all times. </p><p>"Harry," Hermione voiced. "Why are you here?" She barely lifted her head. She was in no headspace to make full-on eye contact with anyone right now, even her best mate. </p><p>The man she'd known throughout all of Hogwarts wasn't the same either. Harry had aged significantly. She wasn't sure if it was from the war, his ongoing struggles with depression post-war, or losing Draco. </p><p>Hermione hoped it wasn't the latter, but she wasn't daft. Hermione knew the love Harry held for the first person to have ever called her Mudblood so many years ago now. </p><p>"'Mione, Ron told me what happened," Harry said worriedly. The witch didn't dare comment. Even had she been brave enough, there was nothing to say. What was done was done, Hermione had accepted his offer now. </p><p>Her life was chosen, and there was no going back on her decision.</p><p>"I'm not surprised he told you," Hermione admitted, finally speaking up. "If you're here to reprimand me, I'm sorry, okay? I wasn't sure I was ready to make such a life-changing commitment." </p><p>"Don't," Harry uttered. "Don't marry him." Harry's words were blunt and to the point. It surprised Hermione. </p><p>Hermione raised her head from the tiles of her kitchen floor and aligned her eyes with Harry's. She'd gotten up earlier to make some hot tea for herself, hoping just maybe the warmth could stifle her sadness.</p><p>"What?" Stunned, Hermione waited impatiently for Harry's reply. </p><p>"I know what's happening between Pansy and you, at least I think I do. I've known for some time now." Harry continued. He seemed relieved to finally say the words out loud, as if he'd been holding them captive for the longest time.</p><p>"I didn't want to admit it to myself at first, you know Pansy is-" Harry stopped himself. <em>Because Malfoy's ever the charmer, right?</em> "What I'm trying to say is, I know you're with her, and if you're with her despite Ron, I know you must love her." </p><p>Harry had lived the same experience with Draco during his blossoming relationship with Ginny. Hermione knew he'd never judge her. She was just happy they'd been able to stay friends, Ginny and Harry, through it all. Hermione was almost certain they same wouldn't have been the case had she and Ron split. </p><p>"Blaise told Ginny. Yeah, they're secretly dating, but don't say anything, nobody knows apart from me. And Ginny told me about Pansy and you after I confessed my doubts to her." For a moment, Hermione stayed silent as she tired to hold back her tears. </p><p>"It doesn't change anything," Hermione whispered. "She doesn't want <em>that</em> from me."</p><p>"That's not the way Blaise made it sound to Ginny. He said he'd never seen her so soft and light; so happy." </p><p>"I swear, she doesn't," Hermione cried. "I'm better off with Ron. As you said, it's better this way." Harry's eyes were suspiciously glazed over now as well.</p><p>"Look 'Mione, I was wrong!" Harry couldn't seem to help himself, tears fell from his cheekbones down his chin. "I should've run after him. Don't make the same mistakes I did!" Hermione hated seeing Harry like this. He didn't deserve it. They both didn't. <em>Is love supposed to hurt this much? </em></p><p>"It's too late, I already said yes to Ron." </p><p>"But he said you-" </p><p>"I just sent the letter with Albert right before you came." Harry sighed. </p><p>"Pansy and you, Draco and-" Harry breathed. "It can't happen all over again. I won't let you feel the pain I'm feeling. I can't. It would break me to see you like this."</p><p>"Harry, you deserve happiness just as much, if not more than anybody I know," Hermione said tenderly. Harry feigned a smile and grasped Hermione's hand in his, giving it a gentle squeeze.</p><p>"Why did you say yes?" Harry demanded as a loud knock echoed through the small apartment. Startled, Harry and Hermione looked at each other, confused.</p><p>"Who could that be?" Anxiety lathered Hermione's voice.</p><p>"You tell me, who do we know in the Wizarding World that knocks?" He simpered. Harry had evidently already forgotten that both Floowork and Apparition were blocked indefinitely.</p><p>Hermione approached the door nervously, turning the doorknob. In front of her stood a very atypically dishevelled Pansy Parkinson. The Gryffindor's heart sank. <em>Why the hell is she here? Didn't she get the message? </em></p><p>Hermione couldn't take any more of this. She just wanted to disappear, become a ghost or something. Pansy's eyes drifted over to Harry's, thankful at the very least it wasn't Ron, and then, looked back at Hermione. </p><p>"You're marrying him?" She couldn't help but ask. She needed to hear it from her. "Why?" Her tone was mean but, had Hermione not been so already-upset, she might've realised the underlying hurt that screamed to be heard. </p><p>"How do you even-"</p><p>"Bloody Weasley owl, recognised the damn thing right off the Firebolt because of Blaise and Ginny's constant owling! Your love letter fell right on me," Pansy spat, her eyes dark.</p><p>"I'm just a good shag. What do you care?" The words stung, but Hermiome forced herself to keep straight face.</p><p>"I- I didn't mean that," Pansy floundered. "You have to know that!" Laughing, Hermione turned to Harry. </p><p>"Can you give us a moment?" Hermiome mouthed almost inaudibly.</p><p>"Are you sure?" Harry asked tenderly. Hermiome nodded and with a death glare in Pansy's direction, and a pouffe, he was gone. </p><p>The two witches, at the opposing end of the spectrum, gazed into each other's eyes, a mesh of autumnal leaves and earthy hues with flecks of gold danced in their hold. </p><p>Where Hermione had only ever seen lust in Pansy's orbs, burning warm flames of passion, now seemed to have melted into something much softer like the old copper of Muggle pennies. Her demeanour, the one always guarded, appeared letdown; barriers caved, soldiers at, rest. </p><p>"Don't marry him," Pansy bit out, jaw tight. Hermione was too afraid. She knew what the Pansy's regard read, but she'd been deceived before. She couldn't allow herself to be again. </p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"Because I don't want you to," Pansy admitted sheepishly. </p><p>"I'm going to need more than that this time," Hermione said, swearing she saw the Slytherin woman's hands tremble ever-so-slightly. </p><p>"I- I'm in love with you," Pansy avowed, shaking like a leaf in the wind. </p><p>Pansy's words struck a chord straight to Hermione's heart. Yes, she'd hurt her, but here Pansy was being more vulnerable than Hermione had ever seen her.</p><p>Before any more self-doubt and panic could fill Hermiome's mind, she pressed her lips against Pansy's, revelling in the familiar yet estranged feeling of it all. </p><p>This kiss wasn't the same as their usual ones. It was warm and welcoming, yes, but chaste. It begged for the outpour of love that had been bottled for too long. </p><p>Their warms tongues collided, exploring facets of emotions they'd been too scared to venture previously. At last, there was peace. </p><p>"I'm in love with you too, Pansy..."</p>
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